The HCG levels in my body have dropped from 213 to 48. Even though I knew this was probably coming...I still had a glimmer of hope. I thought I was pretty well prepared for the results, but it is impossible to be ready for such devastating news.
One miscarriage at 10 weeks, four failed IUI's, one chemical pregnancy with IVF, and another one with FET. I'm physically and emotionally drained! I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm numb, and I'm jealous of every women who has been/or will be blessed with a child. I've yelled, I've cried, and I just feel like sleeping for hours so I don't have to think. I feel like I have hit rock bottom.
I can finally stop all my meds, but the bleeding and cramps could continue to last for a week or two...fabulous! I will have to go in one more time next week just to make sure all the hormones are out of my body. The good news is I start back to work on Monday so I will stay busy. However, Monday is my birthday and there was nothing I wanted more than a baby.
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